20 Things I Learned From The Movies
Bad guys are lousy shots. Some good guys are equally lousy shots so that
standing ten feet apart and firing for several minutes will still leave
both untouched. Other good guys are such good shots that they don't even
have to look at the target.
When being shot at the good guy only has to duck his head and squint to
make the bullets veer into the dirt around him.
Good guys' guns almost never run out of bullets unless it's a revolver,
in which case it will have one bullet less than needed.
Good guys' guns are so powerful sometimes the bad guy is hit even before
the good guy shoots.
It's always fatal to announce that you miss your wife/sweetheart/kids just
before a firefight.
Cars always explode in a ball of fire an instant before collision, and
as soon as they begin to fall over a cliff. One or two shots by the good
guy into the trunk will often cause the car to explode too.
In hand to hand combat the bad guys wait their turn to fight the good guy
rather than gang up on him.
The faster you drive the more vigorously you have to wrench the steering
wheel back and forth continuously, even on a straight road.
If the situation is desperate enough, you can squeal your tires even on
sand or gravel.
No matter where you punch the bad guy it will always sound like your third-grade
teacher's ruler striking your desk.
All vehicles in a chase have the endurance of tanks, except marked police
The amount of damage caused is directly proportional to the value of the
If the good guy seems to be easily winning against the bad guys it's only
because they haven't yet identified the person most important to him in
the whole world who is in with their hostages.
Bad guys shot with a single bullet will be thrown violently off their feet
backwards but if shot with an automatic weapon or several other guns at
once will stand there and jerk spasmodically. They will continue to stand
even when dead until the shooting stops.
Wearing a bullet-proof vest means you will never be shot anywhere but in
the vest. You will have to ruin your shirt by tearing it open after being
If the bad guys have a huge stash of drugs, they'll also have containers
of gasoline or some highly explosive substance conveniently close by for
the good guy to destroy it with.
If you can't make a face that shows how serious you are, looking constipated
is a good substitute.
Developing a romantic interest with someone is almost certain to get them
A sure way to get the girl to follow you into a dangerous situation is
to tell her to stay back out of danger.
If you encounter a geeky, awkward, bespectacled guy, give him a break -
he could be a superhero in disguise.
By: Rod Carty.